Help Wanted Ads 0votes
Ever look at the Help wanted ads and wonder what they really mean Here is our guide to Job Search Lingo
- "Competitive Salary" We remain competitive by paying you less than our competition.
- "Join our fast-paced company" We have no time to train you.
- "Casual work atmosphere" We don't pay enough to expect that you will dress up; a couple of the real daring guys wear earrings.
- "Some overtime required" Some every night and some every weekend.
- "Duties will vary" Anyone in the office can boss you around.
- "Must have an eye for detail" We have no quality assurance.
- "Career-minded" Female applicants must be childless (and remain that way).
- "Apply in person" If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told that the position has been filled.
- "Seeking candidates with a wide variety of experience" You'll need it to replace the three people who just quit.
- "Problem-solving skills a must" You're walking into perpetual chaos.
- "Requires team leadership skills" You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.
- "Good communication skills" Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.
- The other side of the coin .... Phrases for you to use in an interview:
- "I'm extremely adept at all manner of office organization" I've used Microsoft Office.
- "I'm honest, hard-working and dependable" I pilfer office supplies.
- "I take pride in my work" I blame others for any mistakes.
- "I'm personable" I give lots of unsolicited personal advice to co-workers.
- "I am very adaptable" I've changed jobs a lot.
- "I am on the go" I'm never at my desk.
- "I'm highly motivated to succeed" The minute I find a better job, I'm outta here.Read More
You Park Like A…… What?**** 1vote