One-liners
- I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people
who annoy me.
- Don't play stupid with me.... I'm better at it!
- Too many freaks, not enough circuses!
- The more I learn, the
less I understand.
- Do unto others, then run.
- I'd like to help you out, which way did you come in?
- My wife gets more dirt out of a phone than she can out of a vacuum
cleaner!
- I get enough exercise just pushing my luck.
- A bill collector came to my house the other day, so I gave
him a huge stack of old bills.
- Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary.
- The only difference between a yard sale and a trash pickup
is how close to the road the stuff is placed.
- I used to be a heavy gambler but now I just make mental bets; that's
how I lost my mind.
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