5 Lawyer Jokes

Paperwork
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Excerpted from the Empire State Surveyor, New York Society of Professional Surveyors, November 1990:

One of the best examples of how ridiculous government paperwork can be is illustrated by a recent case in Louisiana. A company

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Truck Drivers Tennis Shoes
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Why do truck drivers wear tennis shoes?? Well, to answer that I have to tell you a little story.

One day this truck driver goes into a strip club and sits at a table between a doctor

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Why Does Shit Happen?
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Have YOU ever wondered just WHY shit happens to you?

Well, you're not alone.

People have wondered about this fundamental question for many ages, and everyone seems to have a different

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Great Imponderables!
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1. When an agnostic dies, does he go to the "great perhaps"?

2. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

3. Do you think Houdini ever locked his keys in his

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What’s In A Name?
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PROFESSION NAME
Lawyer's daughter Sue
Thief's son Rob
Lawyer's son Will
Doctor 's son Bill
Meteorologist's daughter Haley
Steam shovel operator's son Doug
Hair stylist's son Bob
Homeopathic doctor's son Herb
Justice of the peace's daughter Mary
Sound stage technician's son Mike
Hot-dog vendor's son Frank
Gambler's daughter Bette (as in Midler)
Exercise guru's son Jim
Cattle thief's son Russell
Painter's son Art
Iron worker's son Rusty
TV show star's daughter Emmy
Movie star's son Oscar
Barber's son Harry
Housewife's son Dusty
Minister's daughter Faith
Day-trader's daughter Hope
Televangelist's daughter Charity
IRS agent's daughter Mony
Geneticist's son Gene
Espresso vendor's son Joe
Undertaker's son Barry
Beautician's son Curly
Gardener's son Moe
Florist's daughter Rose
Baker's daughter Cookie
Manicurist's son Hans
Athlete's son Victor
Lumberjack's son Glenn
Plumber's son John
Accountant's daughter Ira
Musician's daughter Melody
Jeweller's daughter Opal
Gastro-enterologist's daughter Fanny
Politician's daughter Patsy

 

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