2 Random Jokes

A guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball right in the crotch.

Writhing in agony, he falls to the ground.

He finally gets himself to the doctor.

He says, "How bad is

• If athletes get athlete's foot, do astronauts get mistletoe?
• Don't you just hate rhetorical questions?
• AUTOBIOGRAPHY: A work of fiction in which the author is the hero.
• Teacher: The only reason I always try to meet and know
  the parents better is because it helps me to forgive the children.
• Confucius: Man who put head on Rail Road track to listen for train likely to end up with splitting headache.
• The only thing we learn from a new election is we learned nothing from the old.
• I started smoking in high school. I never thought I'd get hooked. I always thought by the time I graduate, that's it, no more smoking. But now I'm 33. There's no way I'm ever going to graduate.
• Why is it when you turn on the TV you see ads for telephone companies, and when you turn on the radio you hear ads for TV shows, and when you get put on hold on the phone you hear a radio station?
• It's bad luck to be superstitious.
• Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.