10 Random Jokes

"Okay, first: it's round, plumb and red."

Of course, Johnny raised his hand high, but the teacher, wisely, ignored him and picked Jenny, who promptly answered, "An apple."

The teacher answered, "No Jenny, it's a beet, but I like your thinking. Now, for the second. It's soft, fuzzy, and colored red and brownish."

Well, Johnny was hopping up and down in his seat trying to get the teacher to call on him. But she skipped him again and called on Billy.

"Is it a peach?"

"No, Billy, I'm afraid it's a potato. But I like you're thinking. Here's another: it's long, yellow, and fairly hard."

By now, Johnny was about to explode as he waved his hand frantically. The teacher skipped him again and called on Sally.

"A banana," she said.

"No," the teacher replies, "it's a squash, but I like your thinking."

Johnny was kind of irritated now, so he spoke up loudly. "Hey, I've got one for you teacher; let me put my hand in my pocket. Okay, I've got it: it's round, hard, and it's got a head on it."

"Johnny!" she cried, "That's disgusting!"

"Nope," answered Johnny, "it's a quarter, but I like your thinking!"

"By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20 degrees, no problem. I'm gonna be 60 next week, and now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand"

"So," says the second drunk, "what's your point?"

"Well," says the first, "I'm just wondering how much stronger I'm gonna get!"

Leroy replies: "Preacher, I need you to pray for help with my hearing."

The preacher puts one finger in Leroy's ear, and he places the other hand on top of Leroy's head and prays and prays and prays, he prays a blue streak for Leroy; the whole congregation joined in with enthusiasm.

After a few minutes, the Preacher removes his hands, stands back and asks, "Leroy, how is your hearing now?"

Leroy says, "I don't know, Reverend, it ain't 'til next Wednesday."